This was written for my daughter, who I probably will never be able to have for many, many reasons. Now, it's a lullaby to myself.
lyrics
I'd fallen so hard, but I picked myself up.
My life far from over, but I'd had enough.
And I won't let it happen again.
And I won't sit and pretend
that you aren't the whole world to me
or that you are the first one to bleed.
Ever since you came to me
it's been so easy to breathe,
although you turn and curse me
from the moment I leave.
So let me hold you like I used to at night
when nightmares would wake you in fright.
I'm an old maid, but humor me still:
remember when life had its thrill?
And you aren't a soldier or night,
you're a dragon shortly barren from flight.
You're an entity, you command all the skies.
In the winter, towards the sun must you fly.
But don't get too close, or your scales will start to crack
and you'll realize you're burning and you'll have to turn back.
It gets better, life changes with ease:
the ocean, the moon and the trees;
inconstant, like the blood in your veins,
in motion, like the wind through the plains.
THIS IS NATURAL,
like the galaxies unknown: vast and terrible,
but God made them glow.
Avery, why won't you talk to me?
Don't you ever forget that I love you to death
and you make me happy when the sun is at rest.
And the grey skies that your smile could clear
are ephemeral, as are all these tears.
And one day, I promise, you will look back and laugh
at the miseries you never thought you'd outlast.
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